Teens 'n' Tweens: The Change-Up!

I felt sorry for our Teens 'n' Tweens-Beat blogger Queen sister Amanda and her never-ending slate of sloppy love movies, so I took her to Funk Nasty Fart Joke The Change Up yesterday, and then talked to her about what she thought:

thesubstream: What movie did you see?

Amanda: The Change Up. Freaky Friday for bros who like a wholllle lotta dick jokes.

tss: What was it about?

A: Duuuuude, like being a working stiff is a drag! It makes your wife hate you. And also being a fuck up that no one likes is a total bummer! It makes you do sexy movies. So don’t do either of those things. Be both. Pee freely in fountains!
tss: What happens in the movie?

A: Jason Bateman and Ryan “Sexy” Reynolds, are like these two brosefs (Dave and Mitch) who have known each other forever. But so Dave is like a lawyer with 3 kids who sometimes shit right into his mouth hole-

tss: Yeah, that was gross.

A: As hell! Mitch is an unsuccessful actor. So basically it’s Two and a Half Men with bongs and ball shaving. 2 and a Half Men with actual Charlie Sheen.

tss: Nice one! 

A: Yeah, so. Then magic fountain pee makes them switch bodies! Uh oh mega dilemma! So many hijinks ensue! Babies throwing meat cleavers. Wives getting really mad cause their husband (actually not their husband) swears a lot and steals all the chicken. Husbands having to pretend they are single swinging dudes going on dates with their assistants that are really hot! First they’re like screaming to each other “your life sucks!!” but then they’re like “my life sucks!!” until they’re like “no it doesn’t, I love my wife/weed!” Then everyone is happy!

tss: What was the message?

A: Probably that babies are yucky. JK JK lol. Ummmmmm I guess that like don’t covet thy neighbours stuff, bro-dude. Cause you should just probably chill out/get your shit more together and then everything will be groovy.

 

tss: Did Ryan Reynolds look totally hot?

A: He had a weird hair situation that was mildly distracting, and he wasn’t topless enough at all. But yeah man, that dude is an Adonis.

tss: What was the best part?

A: Actually I think that Jason Bateman swearing his head off was really wayyyyyy more amusing than I thought it would be.  

tss: What was the worst part? (Note, spoilers follow - Ed.)

A: Oh easily the "Lorno". Since Mitch is a crappy actor he has a job that Dave (running his body) has to go do and it’s just so not even ok at all. Light (Note: it's a type of movie that rhymes with "gorno" that we can't type out because it makes our content management system shit itself. Not joking - Ed.)? The old ladies plastic surgery face! Buttholes! I just didn’t like that one little bit.

Also hated how the married dude got to totally feel up his hot assistant's hooters and THEN realized he wanted to be back in his old life. Like c’mon. Not fair.

tss: Is it good for teens and tweens out there to watch?

A: Uhhhhh. No. Kinda no. Pretty filthy. Sneak in if you have to cause woah oh so many F-bombs and boobs and you’ll probably like it a lot but I can’t be responsible for your life choices.

tss: That seems reasonable.