Rajorajorajo | 4 Oct 2011 | 790 Views | 4 Likes | 0 Dislikes

Teens 'n' Tweens: What's Your Number?

Teens 'n' Tweens-beat Blogger Queen Sister Amanda is back and we made her see a movie that we'd rather… not.

thesubstream: Hey Amanda, what movie did you see?

Amanda: What’s Your Number? More like… more like… What’s Your… um, vagina?

tss: huh?

Amanda: Oh Oh! I got it! More like – Hey! Don’t be a Slut! That was a good one right?

tss: So the movie is about sluts, then?

Amanda: It’s about the Last Single Girl in the World. Anna Farris is reads the bible (a.k.a. Cosmo) and finds out she’s a big whore and is ruining her life (and lady parts) with alllllll the gross dudes she’s banged. So she hires her slutty/hunky/sexy/womanizing neighbor to track down said gross dudes and find out if one of them is, uh... not gross now? Wants to marry her? Doesn’t play with puppets anymore? Sure, good plan right?! Yep, Best Plan Award right there, crown and sash for you LSGITW.

tss: LSG... I... Oh, Last Single Girl in the - Ok, I get it.

Amanda: Soooooo she finds ‘em all, and all kinds of buffoonery happens. She gets a proposal to be one dude’s beard, flies to Miami to get recognized by her vagina instead of her face, etc. You know, all normal stuff that totally happens to reformed skanks. But in the process, she falls in real actual love with slutty neighbor! Romance!

tss: This sounds like a movie with a positive message.

Amanda: I guess it was mostly ok? Some of it was like, "you’s a big ho, stop it ho or you won’t get the diamond or whatever." But I guess it was "don’t pretend to have a British accent when you’re dating a British dude, or fake that you like shit that you just don’t and instead, fall in love with someone that likes who you are. Inside. The real gooey centre that farts and barfs sometimes and maybe is just a big huge weirdo that looks grody in the morning. Be you dude, just be you." That's the message.

tss: Wow, deep.

Amanda: Though, I could have done without the whole “Hey look I’m a womanizing, slutty dude, and that’s totally cool and I’m not gonna change my ways until I meet the one and that one is now YOU!” storyline. That’s kinda tired and maybe invalidated the other good stuff a little? I dunno. I’m thinking too hard about a movie starring The House Bunny and Captain America.

tss: Wait, Chris Evans is in this?

Amanda: HELLLOOOOOOOOOOO Sailor! Than man is just super duper attractive.

tss: No argument here!

Amanda: Just the best looking fella I’ve seen in a hot minute. Just the most delicious piece of hunka hunka. Helps that he’s mostly naked for the whole thing. Ditch the cargo shorts though brother, you’re not in Alpha Gamma Zeta or whatever.

tss: Any eye-candy for the fellas?

Amanda: Well, Anna Faris is pretty much a mega babe in booty shorts and tank tops the whole time, which well- that’s cool. You see her butt a lot. But no, it’s mostly a hot dude festival. Like Dave Annable! And Anthony Mackie! Lot’s of handsome mens up in here.

tss: What was the best part? OF THE MOVIE, I mean.

Amanda: I’m a little bit obsessed with Andy Dwyer from Parks and Recreation (Chris Pratt) and so I got really giddy any time he came on screen. If I’ma be real though, so much naked Chris Evans.

tss: Thanks for be real with me. What was the worst part?

Amanda: It felt a little like they had to smash two movies together. Like there was a raunchy girl comedy, and then a super cliché love story and they didn’t really fit? Idk, maybe it was just that it was pretty much really dumb. Funny, but just dumb.

tss: Well, it sure sounds like an appropriate film for teens and tweens to see! Lots of important life lessons and such.

Amanda: Sure, but only for teen girls that have a cool unmarried older sister that reads Jezebel.com and can make sure they understand that the whole concept of the movie is just straight up ridiculous.

tss: Well thanks for reviewing it!

Amanda: NP!

tss:...

tss: Right, "No Problem." Of course.

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